


Midnight

by Treta_Aysel



Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, M/M, Modern Era
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-01-01
Updated: 2020-10-03
Packaged: 2021-02-27 07:35:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 15,703
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22063393
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Treta_Aysel/pseuds/Treta_Aysel
Summary: John meets Alexander at a New Years Eve party on campus and they hit it off! John's already engaged to his long-time girlfriend, Martha Manning. Soon, he finds his two worlds colliding and he must tell his family what he really wants.
Relationships: Alexander Hamilton/John Laurens, Hercules Mulligan/Elizabeth Sanders Mulligan, John Laurens/Martha Manning
Comments: 9
Kudos: 37





	1. Chapter 1

_December 31st_

_6 P.M._

"There's a party tonight down at the student union, you coming?"

Blinking, John looked away from the neon green flyer that was pinned to the bulletin board in the first-floor corridor of the dorms. Standing behind him was the RA, Hercules. "Nah," he shook his head, turning away from the bulletin board. "Not my taste."

Despite the eyeroll that Hercules gave him, a small smile tugged at his lips. "Well, if you change your mind, let me know. Ellie mentioned she was bringing someone from one of her classes she wants you to meet. She thought the two of you might hit it off."

It was John's turn to roll his eyes. He knew that Ellie meant well but most of the time when she wanted to try and set John up it never ended very well. "Tell her thanks, but no thanks. I might spend the evening in my dorm and just call Martha or something."

Martha Manning, John's long-time girlfriend since high school. She was the last person that he had wanted to talk to and part of the only reason they were together was because of both of their father's long-standing political positions and both families were wealthy.

John had asked Martha to a school dance out of kindness when she stated she hadn't been asked yet. They had been friends since childhood and he could do her a favor and just ask her, right?

Before he knew it they were dating despite him not being physically attracted to her.

Hercules rose an eyebrow, looking over John before tilting his head to the side. "Right, well my sources tell me that you've been avoiding her calls since Thanksgiving break." John made a mental note not to tell Gilbert about his troubles. While Gilbert was a good friend and had good intentions, everything seemed to get back to Hercules and Ellie.

"Do you need another pamphlet on coming out to your parents?"

John let out an exasperated sigh. "No, and I'm done having this conversation." He turned away from Hercules, almost sprinting down the hall to his room. They've had this conversation at least twice since Hercules became the RA two semesters ago and right now, John wasn't in the mood to have another one.

He threw his book bag on the chair across the from the bed. While most dorms could house two or more students, his father had paid to make sure he didn't have a roommate. He wanted John to get the best education he could a lot of times it could be lonely with no one to talk to.

It didn't help that most of the people had gone home.

As John laid on his bed, staring at the ceiling, he closed his eyes.

His phone vibrated.

It was Martha, asking him to text or call her as soon as he could.

He threw the phone onto the book bag.

Part of the reason he avoided going home over the holidays, besides wanting to avoid his father talking to him about his future, was to avoid whatever conversation she wanted to have. Over Thanksgiving break something had happened between the two of them and John wanted nothing more to do with it. As soon as he came back to school, he began ignoring all her calls, texts, emails, IMs. Whatever way she tried to contact him.

At this point, he was surprised she hadn't tried carrier pigeon. Even if she did, he was sure he could find someway to avoid even that.

He rolled over on his side away from his phone, drifting off to sleep.

_7:30 PM_ John wasn't sure how long he slept but awoke to a pounding on his door.

"John Laurens! Open this door now!" He groaned as he pushed himself up and staggered over to the door. The dorm walls were thin.

Glaring, he turned the doorknob to find Ellie standing there with Hercules. "Sorry, John, I tried to tell her that you didn't want to go."

Ellie's arms were crossed in front of her chest, a less than pleased look across her face. "Seriously? What's this crap about you not going? I worked so hard to find someone for you to meet and you're not going? Like hell you're not going."

"Ellie I-."

She held up her hand to keep him front talking before it went to her hip. "Look, I don't want to hear any excuses and I know I set you up with a couple of duds in the past, but I think this guy would be good for you. Please?"

John stared at her, neither of them relenting until he sighed and shook his head. "Fine," he muttered as he turned to look over his shoulder. There was hardly any space to invite them inside the tiny room. "Just give me a minute."

John shut the door on them before opening the closet in the room. He changed into a nice sweatshirt and a pair of jeans. He didn't want to try too hard to impress someone that might end up not liking.

John shut the door on them before changing, opening the door to see Ellie and Hercules still there. "Ready as I'll ever be."

Ellie eyed him for a moment before shrugging her shoulders. "Fine, I suppose that's going to have to do. Now, let's go before we're late."

_8 P.M._

The music was loud and blaring. John was also sure he saw a senior spike the punch. He made a mental note to just go for the water instead.

It was supposed to be a sober event since it was school sponsored but even John knew that was a joke. Someone always seemingly spiking the punch one way or another. He was leaning against the wall; left hand in his pocket of the jeans he was wearing and right hand on the red solo cup with the unspiked punch.

"Bonsoir, mon ami," a voice greeted him, and John gave a half smile as Gilbert approached him.

"Hey, Gil," he nodded. He brought the punch to his lips, taking a sip of it.

"I see Ellie dragged you to the party as well," Gilbert's French accent was a welcome sound to his ears, better than the music that the party was blaring.

John nodded as he let out a hum. "Well, she said she had someone for me to meet. I don't know. The last time she set me up, it didn't end up very well and I ended up getting burned pretty badly from that."

Gilbert let out a small sigh as he took a sip of his own punch. "I know, but Ellie does mean well, you know that, right?"

John sighed. "I know, I just…" He shook his head. "I don't know. I want someone but it's more complicated than what everyone is making it out to be."

"You mean because of Martha?"

John nodded as he glanced down to his shoes.

"Look, John, we can tell Ellie you don't want to meet this person but the party is full of people. You should try and meet someone still."

John gave Gilbert a half smile. "Do I have a choice?"

Gilbert flashed him a grin, "None what so ever."

John rolled his eyes, grin still on his face. "Fine, who do you think I should go flirt with?"

The two men stood there against the back wall and scanned the area for anyone that they thought might have been good to talk to. Finally, Gilbert nudged John and pointed over at a man standing on the other side of the room in his own corner, staring at his phone. "What about him?"

John blinked as he studied him, a small blush creeping onto his cheeks as he looked over at Gilbert. "I don't know, I mean, he's good looking but that doesn't mean he's into men."

Gilbert rolled his eyes, taking John by the shoulders before making him face the other man. "You'll never know if you don't try. Now go."

John nearly tripped over his own feet as he looked over his shoulder, glaring over at Gilbert. He glanced down at his red solo cup before pounding the rest of the alcoholic punch that was in there. He set the empty cup on the fooze ball table next to other abandoned cups and made his way over as he took in a deep breath. "Hey."

That seemed to draw the man's attention away from his phone as he looked up and saw John standing over him. "Oh, hey." He offered a small smile. "Did you get dragged here too?"

John let out a small laugh, nodding his head. "Yeah, how can you tell?"

The man shrugged, grin on his face. "Well, I figured if you came on your own you'd be out there dancing on the floor with everyone else."

John glanced out on the dance floor to see people drunkenly dancing and tripping over one another. The stranger had a point. He probably would have been out there dancing like that, but he was here standing against the wall talking. "Well, you're not wrong. I'm John, by the way."

The stranger nodded his head, a pleasant smile on his lips. "Nice to meet you, John. I'm Alexander."

_10:30 P.M._ A couple hours had passed since the party had started and John was sitting outside for some fresh air with Alexander. There was a spot of grass next to the student union. John was sitting cross-legged on the grass as he stared down at his lap for a moment before glancing over at Alexander. They had been talking for a while and everything they were talking about was natural and not forced.

"So," John began as he pressed his lips together before glancing down at Alexander. "You said you were dragged here too. My RA and his girlfriend dragged me here. Who dragged you here?"

Alexander pushed himself up, so he was sitting cross-legged next to John as he glanced up at the sky. It was cold, but they were too far into their own little world to notice. "Ah, a classmate of mine. I'm Prelaw and there's a woman in my classes named Elizabeth Sanders, she dragged me here saying that she had someone for me to meet." Alexander paused as he noticed John sort of staring at him with an open mouth. "You okay?"

It took a moment or two before John broke out laughing, trying not to fall over. "Well, funny you should say that. Ellie—err, Elizabeth dragged me here as well. Her boyfriend is my RA and he tried to get me to come and when that failed Ellie herself came upstairs and dragged me here."

Alexander laughed, shaking his head. "Well, I'm glad I got to meet you then. And I have to say, she has excellent taste. You're pretty good looking," he added with a wink.

John felt heat rise to his cheeks as he stared at the frosty ground in front of them. He nudged Alexander with his shoulders before glancing up at the other man. "Yeah, well, you're not so bad looking yourself."

A moment of silence passed between the two of them. "Do you think we would have met?"

"What do you mean?" Alexander asked as he studied John for a long moment.

"If we weren't dragged to this party."

Alexander shrugged. "It's a big campus but maybe." Alexander sat up and glanced around a moment before turning his head to the door. "Let's head back inside? We're freezing our asses off out here."

_11:50 PM_ "I would suggest that we try and play a game of fooze ball, but…" Alexander spoke as he nodded his head over to where a couple was making out against the table.

"'s okay," John said as he shrugged his shoulders at him, smile on his lips. "It's almost midnight anyways." He gestured to the room and the two of them could see couples starting to pair off for the night.

Alexander nodded as he picked up the cup that he had set down, taking a sip of the liquid that was inside. "Right, how much longer do we got?"

John looked at his watch. "Uh, about seven minutes."

"Any New Years resolutions?"

John sat in thought for a moment as he thought back over the past year, sipping a bit at the drink in his cup. "To be more honest."

"With yourself or with others around you?"

John gave him a half smile. While he didn't tell Alexander everything, he had certainly told him enough. Sometimes it was easier to tell your problems to strangers than the people close to you, but he didn't want to pile everything onto Alexander. "Both, actually. You?"

Alexander took in a deep breath as he seemed to be mulling in his mind for something to say. "I want to leave my mark, somewhere. It's one that I make every year and every year I'm determined to fulfill it. I never do though."

John smiled a tiny bit. "Well, I believe you will this year."

Alexander grinned. "Thanks."

John felt heat rise to his cheeks. Normally, he would have just looked away and brushed it off. This time, however, he let his eyes drift down to study Alexander's lips. He felt his own suddenly dry and licked his lips to wet them.

He barely registered what was going on around them. The countdown to New Year's had begun.

_10_

_9_

_8_

_7_

_6_

_5_

_4_

_3_

_2_

_1_

"Happy New Year!" The room shouted, and couples found their lips meeting one another. Their lips found one another's like moths drawn to a flame. Alexander's hands found their way to John's waist and John's arms found their way around their way around Alexander's neck. Moments later the two of them parted, staring into each other's eyes when John's widened suddenly, pushing Alexander away.

"I'm sorry. I-I have to go!" John jumped up and began to head towards the door back to his dorm.

"Wait," Alexander called as he stood up following him.

John could hear Gilbert's voice in his head telling him that he must've been Cinderella or something with a hot guy chasing him. He shook his head and made a beeline for the door. "I really have to go."

He had to get out of there.

"John." He could hear Alexander's voice, but he simply ignored it and kept on running.

He pushed open the door and ran down the hall to his dorm room, hiding inside. His back was pressed up against the door as he sank to the floor, taking in a couple of deep breaths as he tried his best to calm himself. A hand came up and he could feel that his face was wet with tears, phone vibrating widely in his pockets with texts.

A hand reached up, brushing away whatever tears were still there on his face as he opened them.

First, there was a text from Ellie: Where'd you go? You okay?

John stared at it a moment before pressing the reply button; I'm fine. I had to get back.

The next text was from his sister Martha or Marta as was her nickname; _Happy New Year, John._

The next text was one that he was dreading. It was from his fiancée and he knew that she wasn't happy with him; _John Laurens, please answer me. You're beginning to scare me. If you don't answer me by the time your classes start again, I'm coming up there to see you. We really need to talk._

Every fiber of his being was telling him to text Martha back and just see what she wanted. This campus was his place away from her. A place where he was free to be himself and be happy, he didn't need her here too.

He took a deep breath, turning away from his phone.

He shut his eyes tightly, taking another deep breath and promptly falling asleep.


	2. Chapter 2

_January 1st  
8 A.M._

"John Laurens!" There was no need for an alarm clock, not when Ellie was yelling at him right now. "Open this door right now!"

John groaned as he pulled his blanket over his head. How Ellie had this much energy early in the morning the day after New Year's, John would never understand. He laid there in the bed, not wanting to deal with Ellie right now. Alexander had probably told her that he ran away after the kiss they shared. He could imagine that she would have an earful for him.

Perhaps if he laid there long enough, she should go away. He held her breath as he laid there for a few minutes longer.

"Fine!" Her voice called back to him through the door. "I'll be back later then!"

John let out a small sigh of relief as he heard her footsteps going back down the hall. He could wait until later to talk to Ellie about why he ran away from Alexander. He knew he shouldn't have; he was having such a good time with him. He pulled his blanket down and stared at the wall in front of him when his phone buzzed.

It was a text from Marta: _Hey! I'm coming for a visit today! Let's go to lunch!_

John frowned at her text. It wasn't like her to say that she was coming for a visit. He sent her a quick text back: _Okay, see you then!_

After hitting send he pushed himself out of bed. If she was coming, he wanted to be somewhat ready to see his sister.

He walked over to the dresser, pulling his clothes out for the day when his phone vibrated again seeing another text from her: _Let's meet at the diner near the campus for lunch._

There was only one diner near campus. She must've been on her way already. He sent her a reply: _What time?_

He tossed the phone down on the bed before pulled out the clothes that he had selected an outfit for the day. He pulled a shirt over his head as the phone vibrated once again. He turned to see her message on the screen before it went all dark again: _How does noon sound?_

_Sounds just fine to me._

He glanced up at the clock, noon couldn't come soon enough.

_Revolution Diner_

_12 P.M._

John looked around the diner as he entered. Normally, during the semester everyone was there meeting and doing homework amongst the crowd of locals but since there was a break the diner was empty.

"How many?" The hostess asked as he walked over to her stand. He did a quick sweep around the room to see if Marta was already there. He didn't see her anywhere. She must've still been on the road.

"Two, my other party hasn't arrived yet."

The hostess smiled and the light caught the silver name tag that was clipped to her blouse. She grabbed two menus. "That's okay, I'll get you seated and direct them to you once they've arrived."

"Thank you," a small pause as he read her name tag once again. "Peggy."

She shrugged as he followed her to a booth. As soon as he slid into his seat, she handed him a menu. "Don't mention it. We're slow today anyways."

He nodded as he took the menu, glancing over it. As soon as he looked up, he could see his sister coming over and sliding into the seat across from him. He set the plastic covered menu over at Marta. "You made it."

She shrugged, taking her purse off and setting it against the wall of the booth. "Sorry, I was stuck in traffic." She smiled as she picked up the menu that was left at her spot waiting for her. "So, how have you been?"

John's lips pressed together before he let out a small sigh. "Why are you really here, Marta?"

She blinked once. "What are you talking about?"

"I know you're checking on me either for Dad or for Martha."

Marta let out a small sigh as she sat back in her sea. "Neither of them asked me to come, John. I know that Martha had mentioned it to her parents who mentioned it to Father that you hadn't answered her in a while but neither of them asked me to come. I just wanted to come and see you. You're alright, right?"

John was silent for a long moment unsure of how to answer her question. He knew that physically he was alright, but was he alright mentally? As he opened her mouth to answer he noticed the waitress standing next to the table. "Are you two ready to order or do you need another minute?"

John barley looked up at her, but Marta gave her a wide smile. "Could we have another minute please? We're still deciding but we'll both have an iced tea, please."

The woman smiled, nodding her head. "Sure thing, coming right up."

Marta still smiled as she watched the woman back away before turning back to John. John was playing with the edge of the plastic menu as he let out a sigh. "Marta, I hardly think here is the best place to talk about it."

"John, just give me something. I'm worried about you." Marta looked at him from across the table, brown eyes soft and big.

"I'm just unsure about Martha."

A moment of silence filled the air before Marta spoke once more. "Is this because we have the same name because you know as well as I do that no one's called me Martha in ages. I go by Marta and you know that."

"Can we please order and talk about this later?" Out of the corner of his eye, he could see the waitress making her way back over to them and he would have hated to turn her away again.

Marta glanced over and saw the waitress, sighing as she nodded. "Fine with me but after lunch we're going back to your dorm and talking about this."

John didn't have time to answer because the waitress was standing in front of them with a smile. "Are you ready to order?" She didn't answer them if they needed more time as she placed their drinks of the table in front of them, taking her pad of paper out of her apron.

Marta nodded as she smiled as she handed the woman her menu. "Yes, I'll have a Caesar Salad with thousand island dressing."

She nodded, scribbling it all down on her pad of paper before glancing in John's direction. "And you, sir?"

"I'll have a grilled cheese with the fires."

The woman smiled, glancing up from her pad of paper. "Coming right up."

As soon as the waitress had left to put in their orders, Marta let out a small sigh. "Are you sure you can't tell me what's really going on here?"

He wanted to. Deep down inside of him, with every fiber of his being, John wanted to tell her. He wanted to tell his sister that he had spent an amazing night with someone he had just met and felt more affection for him than he ever did for Martha.

They were in a public place, however, and their father was a well-known man. John and his siblings had tried to stay out of the public eye, but it got harder and harder as their father got further and further into politics. He started out small, of course, winning a few local elections. He was now moving on to state elections and running for the sente. John wouldn't be surprised that in a few years' time their father would make a run for president.

He sighed, shaking his head. "How's father's campaign going?" It was a safe topic to talk about there in the diner and one that he hoped that she wouldn't change it back to him.

Marta shrugged her shoulders. "The usual, he's still pushing the same narrative as when we were kids."

Thankfully the topic was no longer him for the time being.

An eyebrow rose and he looked at his sister, a small smirk on his lips. "You mean the _my-wife-died- tragical-and-I-raised-my-kids-on-my-own_ narrative?"

Marta grinned and nodded. "The very one!"

"You think after so long people would tire of the same narrative. I mean we're almost all grown by now. I hardly see how it's going to work on people."

"Well, to be fair, it's no longer local elections but statewide. There are people who haven't heard that narrative before and he, of course, needs ways to gain votes so he pulls out the old classic." As Marta spoke, the waitress brought their meals over setting it down in front of them. They both thanked the woman, watching her walk off an attend to other customers in the diner.

John would have to remember to give her a good tip for her dealing with the two of them.

Without another word the two of them dug into their meals.

_John's Dorm_

_2:30 PM_

"Now," Marta began as she shut the door to the room behind them. John removed his jacket and set it on the bed as he looked over his shoulder at her.

"Now what?"

Marta pulled the chair out from John's desk, sitting in the chair as she watched her brother. "What's going on between you and your girlfriend? She said she hadn't talked to you since November and it sounds like she really wants to talk to you."

John frowned as he lowered himself on to the bed. He was going to have to tell his sister at one point or another, he knew that. A hand came up and rubbed the back of his neck. "It's a long story, Marta. I'm sure you have to get back sooner or later."

He was stalling.

He knew that.

Marta frowned right back at him, arms crossing in front of his chest. "John, tell me, what's going on. I want to be there for you but the best way that I can give you any support you need is that if you talk to me."

"I'm gay." The words left John's mouth smoother than he expected. They were freeing. He felt that a weight had been lifted off his shoulders just by telling his sister.

There was a moment of silence and John was suddenly dreading the worst. He wasn't too sure exactly how his sister was going to react and hadn't really thought about it until the words left his mouth. He cast his gaze down for a moment before looking up at her and she finally let out a small sigh.

"How long?"

He rose an eyebrow at her. Was she trying to ask how long he had known? How long he had been gay? "How long? How long have I been gay?" It was a confusing question and he was about to lecture her that it wasn't a choice when she shook her head at him.

"No, but how long have you known?"

John shrugged. He thought about it and he just knew when he was a young child he shared the same thinking of the things that he saw around him and in that men and women married each other but in high school, after getting with Martha he found himself being more and more aware of the fact that he was attracted to the men around him. "I had been having thoughts about it and was becoming more and more aware of it after getting together with Martha and I think it was conformed on my trip to Switzerland junior year."

It was the first he really spoke of this trip with his sister or anyone really. It was a memory he held privately for many different reasons and this was one of them.

Marta sat there nodding her head before giving him a small smile. "Well, I'm glad you told me and don't worry. I won't go back and tell them, like I told you, I'm here to see you and see how you're doing."

John smiled at her and nodded his head as he glanced down at his shoes on the ground.

"Just one question though."

John blinked as he looked up at her again. "What is it?"

"What about Martha? What are you going to do?"

"Why do you think I've been avoiding her? I don't know how to talk to her yet and after last night I'm not sure I want to. Can't I just move away from everyone?"

"No, that's a horrible thing to do!" Marta rolled her eyes and shook her head as he glanced down at her watch. "Oh, I think I should get going. It's getting dark and I told dad I would be back by dinner."

John smiled as they both stood up and Marta came over, pulling him into a big hug. "Thanks for visiting, it was nice seeing you."

Marta nodded, pulling away as she grinned at him. "I'll see you later, okay? Just, try and talk to her okay? You can't avoid people forever you know." She said as he walked over to the door before slipping on out.

John let out a small sigh as he sank back onto the bed in the room when there was a knock on the door. He let out a groan. Speaking of avoiding people he thought to himself as he stood up and made his way over to the door to find Ellie standing there on the other side, arms crossed in front of her chest. "We need to talk. Now."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had a lot of fun writing this chapter. There's going to be a lot of things happening in this story and I thought this chapter would be a nice little break before things pick up again the next chapter with a little sibling time and before anyone asks; Alexander will be back in the next chapter.


	3. Chapter 3

_January 1st_

_John's Dorm_

_3:30 PM_

"We need to talk. Now."

A frown was etched onto John's face as Ellie stood there. He knew he couldn't avoid her forever and must have seen Marta leave. Sighing, he swung open the door all the way and let her in. Ellie made her way in and sat down in the chair that his sister had just been in.

As soon as the door to the room shut, Ellie began. He didn't need to ask her why she was here.

"Really, John? You leave the poor guy that I worked so hard to set you up with!"

John winced a moment as he sat down on his spot on the bed. "I didn't mean to, Ellie! We kissed and like suddenly, everything felt all too real. I have a fiancé back home."

"Yes, but you don't love her."

Sighing, John closed his eyes as he let his head rest against the stone wall behind hm. "I don't know what to do, Ellie! She keeps trying to reach out and contact me and all I can think about is Alexander and how much more fun I had with him last night than I've ever had with Martha! I know that's messed up but it's the truth!"

Ellie frowned from her spot in the chair. "Then why did you run away from him?"

John threw his hands up in the air. "I was scared, Ellie. Scared to think that I would have to choose between my family and path that's already all laid out." It had been planned since he was in high school, go to college as a pre-med student. Marry Martha and eventually go to medical school before doing a residency after. It wasn't John's plan; it was his father's and all his life he thought his father knew best for him.

"Well," Ellie began as she stood up from her seat as she made her way over to the door. A sigh escaped her lips as she turned back and looked over at John. "Truthfully, I was coming over here to yell at you for ditching a great guy, but it sounds like your conflicted enough."

John stared at her for a long moment. "Can you tell him I'm sorry?"

She shook her head. "No, it wouldn't mean anything coming from me." A small pause before she spoke once again. "If you want to though, he studies a lot in the library. You're bound to see him there in one of the private study rooms."

John nodded as he pushed himself up from the bed, making his way over to the door with Ellie. Ellie wrapped her arms around John in a hug before letting go. "I have to go, but cheer up, okay? You'll figure it out."

John nodded as she left. "Thanks, Ellie." He watched her bound down the hall from his dorm room. She was right he had a lot to think about.

He shut the door behind him and went back over to his bed, falling on top of it, gaze fixated on the ceiling.

He wouldn't be able to sleep anytime soon.

_January 7th_

_Campus Library_

_12 PM_

John had shut himself in his dorm room for the past week. He had been deep in thought and wanted to wallow in his misery on his own, not wanting to drag anyone else down with him. While most of the campus was still gone with the holiday, he was thankful the library was still open. Hours were modified sure, but they were still open.

He needed to get out of his dorm and find something else to do than letting two different situations play out in their hundreds of alternate endings.

He needed a book to read.

As he came into the main part of the library, he did a quick glance over at the tables where people studied. They were empty save for one person sitting in the back on his computer, probably gaming.

As he turned to head over to the stacks, he stopped. He remembered Ellie saying that Alexander came in here to study. He shook his head as he suddenly made his way to the study rooms, finding Alexander locked away in one on his own laptop.

John took in a deep breath before knocking once on the door.

He was probably the last person he wanted to see right now but it didn't matter. He had to apologize.

John was about to knock again when the door opened.

Alexander frowned at him. "Oh, it's you."

John wanted to draw back, but he cleared to throat and looked up at him. "Look I wanted to apologize to you about New Year's." To John's surprise, Alexander turned around and went back over to his laptop, leaving John to catch the door before it shut on him. "Hey, are you listening?"

Alexander nodded. "Yes, but I only have this room for another half hour, and I want to get this work done. You can keep talking, I'm listening. You were in the middle of an apology."

There was a pause before John continued. "Like I was saying, I'm sorry. There was a lot going on and I scared and ran away." A pause. "But that was a complete dick move to you on my part."

"Yes, it was." Came Alexander's answer moments later. He shut his laptop before giving his full attention to John. "Iwas having a nice time with you and then the next moment you were running like it someone was going to come after you. I understand that we don't know each other that well and you have your personal life that I don't know anything about, but it was a really shitty thing for you to do."

John let out a laugh, shaking his head. "Maybe I'll tell you over a coffee sometime."

"Sure, I'd like that."

John's eyes widened as he looked down at the other man in surprise. "Wait, seriously?"

Alexander nodded as he shrugged. "Sure, why not?"

"I just thought you wouldn't want anything to do with me after I ran away."

"You apologized and I appreciate that."

"And you want to get coffee with me?"

Alexander nodded. "Sure, why not. We were getting along really well and why not and see where this is going to go."

There was a moment of silence as John didn't say anything. He pursed his lips together in thought as he glanced over at Alexander. "While coffee with you sounds nice, can we make it a real date instead? After I ran away from you and was just a complete jackass it's the least I can do. I mean if you want to go that is."

"Sure," Alexander reached to the notebook next to him. He ripped out a piece of paper and wrote his number on it before handing it to John. "Here's my number."

John took the piece of paper from Alexander, glancing over it quickly before looking over at him. "How does this Friday sound? Eight o'clock?"

"Sounds perfect, text me where we're meeting."

John nodded as he turned and left Alexander in the study room. He let out a loud sigh once he was back in the main part of the library. He couldn't believe that he had just asked Alexander out on a date while he still had a fiancé.

"I am a horrible person," he mumbled under his breath as he finally made his way over to the stacks.

His phone went off all of five minutes later. Reaching into his pocket, he pulled out his phone seeing that he had a new text from Hercules: _Heard you have a date! Congrats!_

John texted back: _If I'm still engaged to Martha doesn't this make me a horrible person?_

He could feel whatever anxiety had left him in the room just now creeping back up as Hercules answered him once more: _Kinda, you need to be upfront with BOTH of them._

John's answer came seconds later: _I need help please._

_Gilbert and I will be by later tonight to help you through this crisis._

John didn't bother answering Hercules' last text. He glanced around the stacks and found he was too anxious to look for a book for even read. He headed back out of the library swearing under his breath.

He would probably have a better time binge watching something on Nextflix.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is a little shorter than the others because I'm fighting off a cold but I still wanted to get something out to you guys! Next chapter should be longer. Also the pacing is slowing down a bit because we're finally settling in but we still have a ways to go and a lot to get through in this fic. 
> 
> Til next time! Love you all!


	4. Chapter 4

_John's Dorm_

_January 3rd_

_6:30 PM_

"So, what were you planning on wearing on this date?" Hercules asked John, standing in front of the wardrobe, looking through the different shirts and pants that were hanging up, trying to create and outfit out of all different combinations that he could find, which weren't very any.

"I think the more important question is; where are you going, mon ami?"

Gilbert was seated on the bed next to John as the two of them watched Hercules go through the clothes. Every so often he would show them an outfit combination only to hear yay or nay from Gilbert and John.

Before John could speak Hercules spoke once again, "Actually, the most important question is; have you told either Alexander or Martha about each other yet?"

A thin line appeared on John's lips as he sat looking at the blanket on the bed, not looking at either Hercules or Gilbert. "No, I haven't."

Hercules turned back to the clothes, going through them once more. "You need to tell one of them. If either of them finds out, you're going to be in deep shit."

"I know, I know. You don't need to tell me twice."

"Anyways," Hercules began again as he turned away from the closet with a shirt and a pant combination in hands. "I think we found your date outfit."

John pushed himself into a sitting position before glancing at the outfit that was presented to him. It was a black button-down shirt with a pair of black pants "Black?"

Hercules shrugged his shoulders. "It's a classic look for any first date. You never did answer Gilbert's question, where are you two going?"

"Oh," John pursed his lips before answering the question. "There's a seafood place not too far from campus that I was going to take him and then perhaps the ice cream shoppe across the street from there."

"Awww, how sweet." Gilbert said as he glanced over at John. John was looking over the clothes before nodding his head. He stood up and laid the choices on the chair before he began getting changed as Gilbert and Hercules talked.

"Well?" Hercules began as he glanced over at John and looked him over. "What do you think?

John was still getting his shirt buttoned as he turned to look at the two of them. He shrugged his shoulders, looking at the all black ensemble. "I think it's a nice thing that we're going out to dinner instead of going out in the middle of the day. It would feel a little silly, besides, I feel like I might be a little overdressed for this date with him tonight."

"I think you look perfect." Gilbert told him as he grinned from John at his spot on the bed,

Hercules nodded as John finished up with his hair, tying it back so it was out of his face and his eyes. "We'll be waiting here for you to hear all about this date."

John nodded, glancing at his phone to see what time it was. He still had sometime before he needed to meet with Alexander. He reached onto the desk and grabbed his wallet. He paused, glancing back over at John. "Do you think my father would be suspicious that I'm up to something if he sees me spending on a seafood restaurant?"

John hated the fact that his father still paid his bills, but his father had made it clear to him before going off to college that he needed to focus on his studies and after he could get a job.

"You could tell him that you passed an exam and went out to celebrate?" Hercules suggested as he shrugged his shoulders. "Or that you had a craving for seafood."

"Or you could borrow money from me and pay me back later?" Gilbert suggested as he began looking through his own wallet. Moments later, he presented John with two hundred dollars in cash.

"I can't take that, Gilbert."

"Yes, you can. In fact, if you don't take it, I'm going to sneak it into your wallet it anyways. It's fine. I hardly need it."

There was a moment of silence before he reached out and took the cash from Gilbert. He nodded his head before giving him a small smile. "Thank you, I'll pay you back."

"I know you will. Also, don't worry about the change. Why don't you get him something a little extra before the date? Flowers? Candy? Something like that."

John nodded as he slid the extra two hundred dollars into his wall before turning back to look at the two of them. "Alright, I'll see you both later."

"Bye," both Hercules and Gilbert waved as John took a deep breath in and stepped out into the hall, ready to meet Alexander for their date.

_Revere's Seafood Bar and Grill_

_7:50 PM_

John took a deep breath in as he stood there outside of the restaurant. He was a little early, but after leaving his dorm he went to grocery store that was a few blocks over and picked up a bouquet of flowers. His palms were starting to sweat, and he wanted to just leave but he was already excited.

"John?"

He blinked several times as John was brought out of his own thoughts and back to reality. Looking over his shoulder, he saw Alexander coming up to him. "Hey," John greeted, a smile growing on his face. He looked down at the flowers in his hand before presenting them to Alexander. "These are for you."

"Oh, thank you." Alexander nodded before smiling as he took the flowers from John. He closed his eyes as he leaned in, inhaling the scent before looking back over at John. "These are really nice. Uh, sorry I don't have anything for you."

John shrugged his shoulders. "It's fine, don't worry about it. I wasn't expecting anything. I just picked those up because I thought you might like them." He smiled back at the other man. "Shall we go inside and find out seats?'

Alexander eyed the restaurant before looking over at John. John wasn't sure but Alexander seemed a bit nervous. Was this place too much? Was Alexander allergic to seafood? He was about to ask when Alexander nodded at him with a small smile. "Sure, that sounds good to me."

The two of them made their way inside. The hostess perked up as the two of them made their way over to her stand. "Good evening, gentlemen. Is it just the two of you tonight?"

John nodded as he gave her a smile. "Yes, ma'am."

She nodded as she grabbed two menus. "Follow me to your seats then."

They nodded as they followed her to their seats. John glanced around the restaurant to see a few people here and there and was glad that the restaurant wasn't too full. As soon as they were handed their menus, John began looking it over before glancing over at Alexander over the top of the menu. "Anything looking good?"

Alexander was silent for a moment or two before folding his menu and setting it off the side. "I was thinking about getting one of their soups."

John looked at him for a moment before nodding and setting his menu off to the side as well. He smiled at Alexander. "So, where did you grow up?"

You were supposed to get to know one another on a date, weren't you?

Alexander shrugged, thanking the waitress that brought them their water. "Are you ready to order?" She asked, taking her out her pen and pad.

John nodded at her. "Yes, I'll have the baked salmon."

She nodded as she wrote it on her pad of paper. "Anything to drink?"

"Iced Tea.

"And for you?"

"I'll have the Bouillabaisse."

She smiled. "Anything to drink?"

Alexander shook his head. "No, I'm fine with water."

She nodded as she collected their menus and turned to bring their orders to the kitchen.

Alexander watched her leave before turning back to John. "What was your question?" He asked the other man softly.

"Where did you grow up?"

"Oh," Alexander pursed his lips. "Well, I was born on Nevis, but I grew up on St. Croix until I was about twelve and then I moved here to live with my cousin and then after that I was in foster care in New York until I was eighteen." He shrugged his shoulders. "What about you?"

John stared at the man for a moment. He had more questions but then he shook his head. "Well, I lived in Charleston, South Carolina for the most part. My siblings and I did live with a family member in London for a year or two, but it didn't last long before we were back at home." A small pause. "Do you have any siblings?"

Alexander shrugged. "I have an older brother but we're not that close because of a lot of reasons."

If there was one thing John wasn't good at it was small talk. He already wanted to kick himself as the questions he was asking didn't seem like the best. He then tried to remember back to New Years Eve and the night that they spent together were they were getting a long and chatting like old friends. "You mentioned before you were prelaw, are you planning on your own law firm?"

With the mention of his major, Alexander seemed to perk right up. John smiled to himself, happy, he found a topic that they two of them could be comfortable with. "Well, I want to excel in these classes so I can get into the law program at Columbia."

John's eyes widened a little bit. "Columbia?"

Alexander shrugged before smiling a bit. "Like I said, I was in the foster care for New York and it became a home for me. I decided to go to school like this that had a better acceptance rate, excel at all my classes here and then I wanted to get a full-ride to Columbia." He was grinning back at John. "I have a full life plan set up for after college even if you want to see."

John paused before shaking his head, small grin on his lips. "No, no, I believe you.

"What about you?"

John blinked. "What do you mean?"

"What are you in school for?"

John let out a soft sigh. "Well, my father's a politician and I know he wants me or my brothers to follow him. If we don't, he wants us to be a doctor, lawyer or be a CEO of a powerful company. Basically, he wants us to keep the family name in the public eye." He glanced over at Alexander, who was frowning at him. "What?"

"But that's not what you want to do."

John blinked once. "Excuse me?"

"You don't look happy when talking about it. It seems more of your father's dreams for you and your brothers. Let me rephrase my question, John, what do you want to do with your life?"

John stayed there, staring at the other man for a long moment. He opened his mouth once before closing it again. Before he could even find something to say, the waitress returned. "Here you both are." She said as she placed their dinners before them.

They both thanked the waitress and dug into their food, the conversation long forgotten.

"How's your dinner?" John asked Alexander softly after a moment or two.

Alexander shrugged. "It's pretty good. How's yours?"

John smiled as he took another bite. "It's pretty good." A small pause. "Do you want a bite?"

Alexander stared at him for a long moment before nodding his head and John smiled and fed him a bite of his salmon. "It's really good, would you like a bite of my bouillabaisse?" John nodded and Alexander offered a spoonful of the soup and John closed his eyes, nodding at it.

"It's really good."

When their meal was finished, and the waitress came back with the check. "Would you two like to see out dessert options?"

John glanced over at Alexander, seeing the other man shook his head. He turned back to the waitress and smiled. "No, the dinner was wonderful though."

She smiled, setting the check down in the middle of the table. "Great, I'm gad to hear. We look forward to serving you again."

As she walked away, John picked up the check and the two of them stood up and made their way to the front. "I can pay for my own dinner." Alexander said softly as he followed John.

John shook his head. "Don't worry, it's on me."

Alexander nodded and smiled.

Once they paid, they found themselves standing outside in front of the restaurant once again. John turned to look at Alexander. "Would you like to join me for ice cream?"

"No, I can't. Like I said, I need to excel in my classes, and I have to finish a first draft tonight." A pause before Alexander continued as he looked at John and smiled. "I had a nice time tonight though. I would love to get ice cream with you another night."

John grinned and nodded. "Sounds good to me."

There was a pause before Alexander leaned in and placed a soft kiss on John's cheek. John's eyes widened a bit as he looked at the other man. "What was that for?'

Alexander grinned. "I figured there was less of a chance of you running away if I kissed you on the cheek."

He was teasing him, and John felt butterflies in his stomach as his face turned red and looked away. He knew he should be honest, but, not tonight, not after they had such a nice time together. "I'll text you tomorrow?"

Alexander nodded as he smiled. "I'll expect a text tomorrow then."

As John watched Alexander disappear, he pulled out his phone to text Hercules and Gilbert: I'm on my way back. You two want a milkshake?

It didn't take long for a reply: Yes.

_John's Dorm_

_9 PM_

John opened the door to his dorm to find Gilbert and Hercules watching a show on Netflix on his laptop. "Hey," Hercules greeted as John shut the door behind him. He made his way back over to the bed as he handed out the milkshakes. "How was the date?"

John shrugged. "It was a bit awkward at first, but it was a nice first date."

"Did you tell him?"

John paused before shaking his head, looking down at his shake, poking the straw into the plastic top. "No."

"The longer you do, the worse it's gonna be."

John wasn't in the mood for a lecture. He looked down once again. "Just start the show." He muttered.

Hercules just shrugged as he stared the show once again, the three of them sitting in silence, drinking their milkshakes as the sound of their show filling the room for the rest of the evening.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed this chapter! Til next time!


	5. Chapter 5

_John's Dorm_

_February 15th_

_4 PM_

Ever since the first date with Alexander, John had been seeing him off and on outside of classes. They both had a heavy workload this semester and found ways to compromise through texting one another in between classes.

John grinned as he pressed send, replying to the latest message before setting down his phone. He turned to his laptop, looking at everything in front of him. A small sigh escaped his lips as he leaned back in his chair. The last thing he wanted to do was work on this paper but, alas, it was one of the last things he needed to get done before their school break in a couple of weeks.

As soon as he began typing his phone began to ring. A quick glance over and he frowned, seeing Martha's name on the screen. Letting out a small breath, he hit answer. "Hello?" He began softly. It had been months since he had last spoken to her and he wasn't sure how she was going to react to him answering the phone after months.

There was a small pause as John braced himself for any reaction from her. _"John?"_ She didn't sound angry or upset, just surprised. _"I've been trying to call and text you for months."_

John frowned, turning in his chair and staring down at the floor. "Sorry," he let out a small sigh as a hand came up and raked through his hair. He wasn't sure what else to say. He didn't want to tell her that he was purposely ignoring her, but he also didn't want to lie to her.

There was a pause and he could hear Martha sigh before she began speaking again. _"I've had so much I wanted to tell you."_

John frowned as he listened to her speak. "Then tell me now?" He asked as he sat back in his chair. He turned in his seat to face the computer. It looked like he was going to be on the phone for a while and might as well try and get work done

Another pause and he could tell, even over the phone, that Martha was thinking about it. Thinking about letting it all out right then and there of everything she wanted to tell him, everything she wanted him to know. _"Not over the phone,"_ she spoke but moments later. _"I was thinking I could come up to your school for a visit this weekend if that's okay."_

John drew in a breath. That was one of the last things he wanted. He had plans with Alexander this weekend, both of them taking a well needed break from their plans. "Martha," he began moments later.

_"No,"_ Martha cut him off. _"Do not blow me off, not again John. This is really important. We need to talk."_

John let out a breath, nodding as he turned away from his computer screen. "Fine, but we're not meeting on campus." He didn't want either her or Alex to run into one another. He needed to keep his two worlds separate. He wasn't ready to let everything out just yet. "I have a couple errands to run this Saturday, can we meet at a diner or somewhere?"

_"Fine, whatever. I'll meet you at the diner, just text me that morning so I know which one I'm going to please."_

John nodded. "I can do that. I'll see you then?"

_"Yes, bye John."_

John sighed as he hung-up the phone and threw it onto his bed. He sat back in his seat, turning to the computer on his desk in front of him. Suddenly, the assignment that he had due didn't seem as important to him. Sighing, he stood up from his chair and made his way over to the bed, picking up the phone he had just lobbed across the room.

Quickly, he pulled up Alexander's number and typed out a quick text. _Hey, something came up with my family. I can't meet this weekend._

It wasn't a lie. Martha and her family were as close as family. His father was always inviting them to any sort of family function they had since they were in high school.

Alexander's text came back quicker than he had thought. If Alexander was upset, he didn't seem show it over texts. Okay, rain check then?

John replied with a quick message before turning back to his work. Sooner or later he was going to have to be honest with either one of them, but right now, he wanted to keep them as separate as he could.

_Revolution Diner_

_February 17th_

_12 PM_

John stood outside the diner; hands shoved in his sweatshirt pockets. He looked around, keeping an eye out for Martha and anyone else that he knew that could possibly be walking by. Finally, he spotted her.

"John!" She waved, a smile gracing her face. He glanced over her, noting how she was dressed up. She glanced over him once, seemingly a bit disappointed, but she didn't say it. She kept the smile on her face, taking her hand in his. "Have you been waiting long?"

John shook his head as he kept her hand in his, letting her lead the way inside the restaurant. "Not at all, perhaps a few minutes but nothing too long."

As soon as they entered the diner, the hostess took them to their seats. Martha smiled and thanked her, and John just gave her a smile. "So," John began after a moment before looking over at her. "What's so important that you couldn't tell me over the phone?"

Frowning, Martha looked over her menu at him. "Can we order first please? I just don't want to get into this when we first get here."

John frowned right back at her. "Martha."

She ignored him and flagged down their waitress with a smile. "Hi, we're ready to order over here." The waitress nodded, taking out her pen and pad of paper, ready to write everything down. "I would like a diet coke and the fish and chips." The waitress nodded before turning her attention over to John.

John frowned before he glanced down over his own menu. "Yeah, I'll just have a water and a cobb salad." He said as he handed back over the menu, glancing over at Martha once again as the waitress left. "Now are we going to talk?"

"Why have you been ignoring me?"

John blinked once, frowning a bit. "You mean since after Thanksgiving break?"

Martha nodded. "Yeah, you didn't join your family for your semester break at Christmas time. I'm not stupid John, I thought we had something nice over there." She reached out to place her hand over John's. He wanted to retract his hand but left it there. "We're getting married and we should be honest with one another."

Her words stung a bit. He wanted to be honest with her. He wanted to open up right then and there, tell her everything and break up with her but he just couldn't, not now. It wasn't the time nor the place. "I'm sorry, Martha. I got caught up with things here. It's not you."

Martha frowned, letting out a small sigh. John could tell that she didn't believe him but wasn't going to call him out or anything. She just smiled and nodded, looking up at the waitress brought their drinks. She thanked her before turning her attention back over to John. "Anyways, that's not all I wanted to talk to you about."

John rose an eyebrow. "What else is there…?"

Martha bit her lip, glancing down at the table. She took in a deep breath before looking back at him, small smile on her lips. "My family is going away during the time that your schools spring break is, and I wanted to invite you to come with us." Her shoulders shrugged. "It's just a weeklong trip to Hawaii but I think it would be fun."

It wasn't his ideal plan for spring break, but it was going to have to do. He didn't see his father letting him out of this one as they did for Christmastime. "Fine, I'll go."

Martha frowned. "You don't sound very happy. Are you alright?"

John nodded. "Yeah, sorry. I haven't been getting enough sleep lately."

Martha nodded as she took a sip from her drink. "There's one other thing too.

"Yes?

"John, I'm pregnant."

John frowned as he stared at Martha for a long moment. "Excuse me?" He asked, voice soft, unsure if he heard her right in the first place.

Martha let out a soft sigh of her own. "We're having a baby. I'm not showing yet and that's another reason I've been trying to contract you as well."

John wanted to ask a million questions. How did she know he was the father? When did she find out? Had she told his family? Of course, he wouldn't say that, especially imply that it wasn't his. He knew Martha had never been anything but faithful, unlike himself.

Instead of waiting for a reply from him, Martha kept talking. "I told my parents, they're a little disappointed but nonetheless excited. They've talked to your father and they've all agreed to move the wedding up."

Blinking, he looked up at her, frowning a bit. "But we're supposed to get married after I'm finished with school and that one be for another year or two. When do they want to move it up to?"

"I know," Martha spoke as she gave him another small smile. "But that was before the baby and you know them and where we're from, have to have a proper wedding and everything before the baby arrives."

Before John could ask the next question, the waitress brought their meals, setting them down in front of them. He looked up at her, giving her a smile. "Thank you," he told her as she turned and left before his attention drifted back over to Martha. "When? When do they want to move the wedding to?"

"June, I think." Her shoulders shrugged. "Or late May. I know they want to give you time to end your semester so it's probably in June. My parents and your dad are the ones planning it. It's just all I know." Martha smiled at him a moment later, glancing down at her food before looking up at him. "We can talk about it later, for now, let's eat, yeah?"

John nodded as he began eating as well.

_John's Dorm_

_2 PM_

After finishing his lunch with Martha, they parted ways. She needed to turn around and drive back home right after to take care of business. He said bye, promising to take her calls and call her more often in return.

He shut the door to his room behind him, feeling like a phantom as he sat down on his bed. His head was swimming, and everything seemed too surreal. He took his phone out of his pocket and had Marta's number pulled up, quickly sending a text: _Did you know?_

It didn't take long before she responded: _Yeah, I did. I'm sorry._

He threw his phone over to the chair before he laid down, turning his back to the door. His eyes stung with tears, biting his lower lip.

Everything was changing too fast.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally in a place where I can write again. I hope you are all staying safe and healthy.


	6. Chapter 6

_March 3rd_

_Honolulu, Hawaii_

_Hilton Hawaiian Village Waikiki Beach Resort_

_5 PM_

John sat on the bed in the room that he was sharing with Martha. She was on the other side of the room standing in the full-length mirror fasting her earrings. Smiling, she turned over to look at John before glancing over at the clock on the bedside table. "John?" She began, trying to get his attention.

John pressed send on his latest text message to Alex before putting his phone away. "Yeah?" He began as he glanced over at her.

"We're meeting my parents in twenty minutes."

"I know."

Painted red lips frowned as she let out a small sigh, turning away from him and back to the mirror. She smoothed out her dress. "Well, you're not dressed yet. I'm sure whoever you're texting can wait until we're back from dinner."

"Fine," he said as he pushed himself off the bed and grabbed his clothes. He hadn't really been keen on this whole trip but after several phone calls back and forth between himself and his father, here he was in a hotel room with Martha.

Minutes later, he stepped out of the bathroom dressed in his nice clothes. He looked at himself in the mirror before turning to her. "You okay?" She asked coming up behind him and resting a hand on his shoulder. He stared at himself for a long moment before turning to look over at her.

"Sorry, I'm fine. I'm just tired."

Martha nodded as she slipped her hand into his, giving his hand a squeeze. "Come on, my parents are waiting downstairs in the hotel lobby."

John glanced over at his phone that was laying on the bed before he followed her out of the hotel room and down to the lobby.

_6 PM_

_53 By The Sea_

John sat up in his seat, smile on his face. He was seated across from his soon to be in-laws and next to his wife and all he wanted to do was run right out of that restaurant. He nodded his head as he glanced at his menu.

"So," Martha's father, Richard Manning, began as he looked up from his menu and smiled at the two of them. "How are the two of you finding your accommodations here?"

John took a sip of his water, smiling at the other man. "They're very nice, sir." Even though his had known Richard and Ann Manning since before he and Martha had even gotten together, being this polite with them was what he knew.

"Good, glad to hear it," Richard smiled as he glanced down at his menu for a moment. "You know Hawaii is where Ann and I came for our honeymoon."

"Sir?" John blinked a couple times, tilting his head to the side. He glanced over at Ann for a moment before his gaze drifted back over to Richard.

Ann smiled and he could feel Martha resting her hand on his knee. "What Richard is trying to say John, we want to pay for your and Martha's honeymoon after the baby is born, of course." She looked between the two of them, letting her hands rest in her lap. "We know that you're still in school and it will be a while before you will be making a reasonable income and we feel is the best way that we can help the two of you."

John stared at the two of them in stunned silence and before he could say anything, Martha spoke first, "Mom, Dad, thank you. This is such an amazing gift." Martha glanced over at John as if waiting for him to say something. "We both think so, isn't that right, John?"

John glanced over at Martha for a moment and he nodded. "Yeah, that's right." He paused a moment or two. "Sorry, I was just caught off guard by the two of you. I hardly know what to say."

Richard grinned taking a sip of his own drink. "Well, we just want the two of you to start things off right and if this is a way that we can help then so be it."

John nodded, smiling on the outside while on the inside he just wanted to run right out of there, but he stayed planted in his seat as the waitress came over and finally took their orders.

_John and Martha's Hotel Room_

_8 PM_

John let out small sigh as he fell onto the bed, eyes closing. He was happy, happy for the dinner with Martha's parents to be over. He picked up his phone to see that he had a few new text messages from Alexander, he couldn't help but smile to himself.

Martha sat down onto the bed, sitting next to him. "Well, that was a nice dinner don't you think?" She asked as she reached up to undo the earrings that she had been trying so hard to put in her ears earlier.

"Did you know?"

Martha blinked once. "Know what?"

John glanced over at her. "Did you know that they wanted to pay for our honeymoon?"

Martha frowned and then shook her head. "No, I didn't. They surprised me as much as they surprised you. Why?"

John shook his head, reading a few of the texts that Alexander had sent him before shoving the phone back into his pocket. "No reason."

Martha frowned before she smiled as she leaned over and placed a kiss to his cheek. "Anyways, now that we're alone I was thinking maybe we should get a bottle of sparkling apple cider sent up here and we have a little celebration."

John shook his head. "I'm not in the mood, Martha."

Martha frowned and let out a small sigh from her lips as she sat up. "John, what's going on."

John shook his head as he stood up from the bed and took off his jacket, heading over to the hotel closet to hang it up. "Nothing, Martha."

Martha frowned as she looked at him. "John, please talk to me," she pleaded as she watched him from where she was sitting. "I'm your future wife and the mother of your child, please. I don't know what happened and I don't know why you're ignoring me but please, we need to talk."

John could feel his phone vibrating in his pocket with a new reply from Alexander, or at least, he hoped. "I can't do this right now, Martha."

"John.."

"Stop!" Martha looked surprised; he never raised his voice at her like that. Shaking his head, he took out the jacket he had just hung back up. "I'm going out for a walk."

Martha nodded, glancing away from him. "Fine, I'm going to get ready for bed," she whispered as he left without saying another word.

_11 PM_

_Hotel Lobby_

John sat comfortably in one of the chairs in the hotel lobby, holding the phone up to his ear. "Yeah, no, I know."

After leaving Martha in the room, it was nice to hear Alexander's voice. "So, how's your vacation with your family?"

Part of John felt bad about lying to Alexander, but it was nice. It was nice to just pretend, even for a little bit, that he wasn't engaged and wasn't expecting a child with the woman he was engaged to. He closed his eyes, pretending he was back home with Alexander and the two of them were having a conversation face-to-face. "It's okay, I'd rather be back at school though."

He could hear Alexander snorting on the other line. "Really? I'd rather be in Hawaii. What's here got that Hawaii doesn't have? It can't be the sandy beaches and nice sun."

A smile tugged at John's lips. "Well, for starters, there's you."

"Aww, aren't you the sweetest." Alexander said on the other line, laughing. "I do have to go. It's late and I need to finish something up."

John nodded his head, "Sure, I'm getting a low battery anyways. I'll see you when I get back?"

"I'll see you then"

John smiled as he hung up the phone, standing and heading back over to the elevator.

_John and Martha's Room_

_11:15_

John slid back into the hotel room, seeing Martha was asleep in bed. He watched her for a moment, letting out a small sigh. He closed the door softly behind him, plugging in his phone to charge as he got ready for bed.

He stood next to the bed, wishing for anything that there was another bed in the room. Giving in, he finally climbed into bed with Martha, back to her. Reaching up, he turned off the light on the night standing.

It was going to be a long vacation.


	7. Chapter 7

_March 10th_

_Campus Library_

_4 PM_

"There you are."

John looked up from his notes, watching as Hercules came over to him sitting himself down in the chair that was directly across from where John was sitting at the table. He rose an eyebrow before turning back to his computer and continuing to work on what he was working on.

Hercules sat there for a long moment, eyebrow raised, and lips pursed as he stared at John. "Seriously?"

John let out a sigh as he saved the paper he had been writing before shutting his laptop. "Is there something I can help you with?"

A small pause. "Yeah," Hercules began a moment or two later. "You can tell me why you're hard to track down."

John rolled his eyes as he took his laptop off the table and slid it into his backpack. There was no use trying to work now as he knew that Hercules just would not leave anytime soon. "I don't know what you're talking about."

"Really now? Just since you came back from Spring Break you're impossible to find. Gilbert says he can't find you, Alexander said that you haven't spoken to him for a few days."

John finished zipping his backpack as he turned to look over at Hercules, frown on his lips. "You've spoken to Alexander?"

Before he could accuse Hercules of prying into her personal life, Hercules spoke up again, eyeroll added, "He has classes with Ellie, remember? And she's been bugging me to see where you've been."

John stood up from the table, slinging the strap of his backpack over one shoulder as the two of them began making their way over to the door. "I've just been working on a paper for my class is all."

Hercules was silent for a long moment. "John?"

"What?"

"Are you sure it's not because you feel guilty?"

John paused, standing right outside the door of the library before turning to look at Hercules, frown on is face. "Excuse me?"

"Are you sure you're not feeling guilty because you haven't been honest with either Alexander or Martha and you just got back from seeing Martha all of spring break and you don't want to see Alexander yet because you feel guilty?"

John's brows furrowed, hands clenching into fists. "I thought you were my friend."

Hercules sighed as he took a step towards John. "I am! I just don't think any of this is right. You need to tell one or both." He paused a moment to step out of the way of students that were making their way into the library. "You need to be honest!"

John let out a huff and turned on his heels before turning to look over his shoulder at Hercules. "Fine, tell Alexander that I'm in my dorm if he wants to see me."

_John's Dorm_

_6:30 PM_

Alexander shifted on his feet as he stood outside of John's dorm, staring at the door. His lips pursed for a moment or two as he lifted his hand and knocked. He had gotten a text from Ellie saying that John was in there. He sighed as he let his hand fall back to his side.

Spring Break had come and gone and while he had missed John it almost seemed like John was avoiding him. Part of Alexander could not help but wonder what he had done to offend John. Part of him wanted to turn around and just leave but as he was about to, the door opened, and John was standing there.

His hair was disheveled and looked like he had been upset but Alexander just smiled at him. Without saying a word, John moved out of the way and Alexander filed into the room, glancing around before turning to John with a smile on his face. "You have nice room."

John gave him a half smile as Alexander sat down on the edge of the bed, he took the seat across from him. "So," Alexander began after a moment or two of silence.

"So," A small pause from John before he continued. "I'm sorry I've been avoiding you. I just wanted to be alone after coming back from spring break. It wasn't…the spring break I had been expecting and I suppose I should have told you."

Alexander glanced down at the floor nodding his head as John spoke, shrugging his shoulders. "I couldn't help but wonder if I said or did anything."

John shook his head. "No, it's not you." Another moment of silence as he shifted in the chair he was perched in. Hercules' words playing in his head again. "Alexander?"

"Yeah?"

John glanced down at the floor before looking up at the other letting out a small sigh. A hand came up and ran through his hair as he offered Alexander a small smile. "There's actually more."

"What is it?"

"I wasn't on spring break with my family." He looked up seeing the confused look on Alexander's face before he spoke once again, taking a deep breath. "I was with my fiancée's family."

Alexander didn't say a word for a long moment as he stared at John. John just stared back at him. Finally, after what seemed like a century, Alexander spoke. "Excuse me?"

"My fiancée?" A pause before John spoke once again, digging the hole he was digging himself in deeper than it was already. "Who happens to be pregnant with my child."

Alexander's whole body got tense and John expected him to start yelling or saying anything else than stay quiet. It wasn't like him to not voice his thoughts on what was going on. After a moment or two, Alexander pushed himself up off the bed and walked over to the door without much as another word.

John frowned. "Alexander?" He began as he scrambled to his feet, following him.

Alexander didn't look back at him. "I think we're done here."

John reached out and grabbed him by the shoulder. "Alexander-"

Alexander stopped, turning to glare at him before pushing John's hand off his shoulder. "I think we're done here." He repeated before turning and heading down the hall, leaving John standing there alone.


	8. Chapter 8

_April 3rd_

_Campus Library_

_2 PM_

It had been a few weeks since John had been up front and told Alexander about Martha and it had been weeks since he had last seen or heard from him. To say that he was avoiding him was a big understatement. It had been weeks since he had last even seen him.

John started down at his phone for a long moment, fingers hovering over the screen for a moment. He kept sending messages but at this point it seemed pointless. None of the messages even seemed like they were evening being read.

Letting out a breath, he quickly typed one last message to Alexander: Just message me when we can talk. Please?

He grabbed his phone and shoved it into his pocket. Out of sight, out of mind, right?

_Dining Hall_

_2 PM_

"How can you work and at the same time?"

Blinking, Alexander glanced over as he saw Ellie setting down her food tray at the same table that he was currently seated at. He glanced down at his salad before looking at the books that were open in front of him before shrugging. "Well, sometimes when you have an exam after lunch you need to do your best to be prepared."

Ellie rolled her eyes as she lowered herself down into the chair.

Alexander's phone buzzed moments later, glancing over. He frowned seeing who the message was from before slipping the phone into his bookbag, ignoring it.

Ellie rose an eyebrow. "John, again?"

Alexander nodded as he took a bite of his food without much of a word. He let out a sigh before shutting his book and putting it in his bag. "You know it wouldn't be so bad if he had told me up front."

Ellie blinked. "About his fiancé?"

Alexander nodded.

"Would your reaction be any different than it is now?"

Without much of another word, he stooped down and picked up his book bag, slinging it over his shoulder. "I have an exam to take, I'll see you later."

Ellie nodded as he turned and left. "See you later…" She said softly.

_May 14th_

_John's Dorm_

_1 PM_

"Did you ever talk to Alexander again?" Gilbert asked, frowning as he watched John move back and forth across the room, packing his clothes into the suitcase that lay open on the bed next to where Gilbert was sitting.

John shook his head as he stopped in front of the wardrobe. "No," he commented as he grabbed the last couple of clothes.

Gilbert blinked and nodded his head. Before he could say a word, the door opened, and Marta came into the room. "Hey, are you done packing? I tried texting you, but you didn't answer."

John shook hie head as he threw his clothes on top of the open suitcase. "Not yet," he commented as he zipped up his suitcase. "I have books to back and my computer still. You didn't need to come as early as you did." A small pause as he narrowed his eyes at her. "You know I could have taken a plane back to Charleston, right?"

Marta shrugged as she flopped onto the bed next to Gilbert. She gave him a quick nod before turning back to John. "Gives me an excuse to get away from Dad for a while. Besides, I don't mind driving you back."

"Fine," John let out an exasperated sigh as he picked up a shoe and tossed it at her. "If you're going to sit there, you can help me back." He turned back to Gilbert with a raised eyebrow. "That goes for you too."

"Well, as much as I would like to," Gilbert began as h slid off the bed, his French accent growing thicker with the faster he talked. "I have somewhere else to be, that's not here. Bye, text me later."

After Gilbert left the room, John turned back to Marta, eyebrow raised. She let out a small sigh. "Fine, fine, I'll take your suitcase down to the car. I'll be back in a few minutes," she called as she left the room.

_Marta's Car_

_3 PM_

"Are you ready?" Marta asked from the driver's seat of the car, checking in the back as John loaded the last box into the car.

John nodded as he shut the back-passenger door, coming around the front. He slid into front seat, shutting the door. He looked at the school before pulling his phone out of his pocket, pulling up Alexander's phone number.

"Is that your boyfriend?"

John looked up, shaking his head and closing out of the text messages. "He's not my boyfriend, Marta."

"And whose fault is that?" She asked, coming to a stop at the red light raising an eyebrow at him.

"Is this why you wanted to drive me?" He asked as he tossed the phone into backseat of the car. "Am I going to have to listen to you talk about this for the next eleven hours?"

Marta grinned as she put pressure on the gas pedal. "Maybe." She rolled her eyes and shook her head. "Come on, John. I just want to be a supportive sibling and you came out to me. I really respect that. I also want you to be happy."

John nodded as he glanced down. "I know."

"Did Dad tell you?"

John blinked and looked over at her. "Tell me what?"

Marta came to a stop again at another red light. "Oh, boy, you're not going to like it. At all." She took in a deep breath. "Dad and the Manning's are talking about moving up the wedding to June."

"WHAT?"

"It's because Martha is showing more than expected. Don't shoot the messenger. So, when we get back to South Carolina you have some major work to do." She paused before letting out a soft sigh. "That is if you don't want to be married to a woman you don't love for the rest of your life. Or I mean, a woman in gereral."

"Not really."

Marta grinned as she nodded. "Exactly what I thought. We have eleven hours to come up with what we're going to do."

He blinked. "What do you mean?"

"I mean telling Dad and everyone else." She paused before nodding her head to the back seat.

John froze in his seat. "Marta, I…I can't tell him."

"You can and it's going to be okay, don't worry."

A hand came up and rubbed the back of his neck as he shifted in his seat. "How do you know that."

"Because I will be there with you," she commented as she reached over, placing a hand on her brother's knee. "Just like I always am."

John let out a small sigh. "Thank you, Marta. You're the best."

Marta grinned. "I know. Now let's get planning. We have under eleven hours."


	10. Chapter 9

_May 15th_

_Charleston, South Carolina_

_3 PM_

"Wake up!" Marta called from the doorway of John's room, chucking the pillow that she had in her hand at him.

John groaned, feeling the pillow hit him. They had rolled in around four in the morning and he wasn't sure how Marta was up and ready to get going on the day. "Seriously?" He sat up, letting out a small sigh as he brought his hand up to try and smooth out his hair.

"What? We made a plan in the car and you'll never get them done if you're laying around in bed all day."

"Fine, fine. Let me get dressed and we can talk about it at least."

Marta grinned. "Good. Meet me downstairs in the kitchen in fifteen minutes."

_Laurens Kitchen_

_3:30_

John finally had dressed, or as much as it was to just pull a sweatshirt and a pair of sweatpants where. Marta was sitting at the table in the kitchen on her laptop, typing away. He walked over to the cupboard, getting a glass and filled it up with water before making his way over to where Marta was sitting at the table.

She looked up as John sat down at the table with a glass of water. "So," Marta began as she glanced over at him. "Yesterday we made a plan on the way home."

"Yes, I know I was there in the car."

Marta rolled her eyes before shaking her head. "Well, the first thing I wanted you to do was to start a conversation with him again. I have one of his social media profiles pulled up or you can choose to text him since you have his number."

John's lips pursed for a moment or two as he pulled his phone out his phone. A couple of clicks and he had the texts to and from Alexander pulled up and staring at them. "John?" Marta asked after a moment or two. She reached out and placed her hand on his shoulder.

"What?"

"Text him."

"Fine, fine."

With shaky fingers, John began typing, deleting, and typing again. He knew it didn't have to be perfect but with the way things were left he needed to at least talk to Alexander, explain everything or at least he hoped he would listen to him.

Finally settling on the message to send him; Hey, can we talk?

Marta blinked as she watched her brother. "So?"

Before he could answer his phone buzzed and he glanced down seeing a new message from Alexander light up the screen: Yeah, alright, call me.

"He wants me to call him."

"Well, what are you waiting for, go ahead and call him."

_New York_

_Mulligan's Apartment_

_3:45_

Alexander stared at the phone in his hand. Hercules was out with Elizabeth, leaving him alone in the apartment. His phone going off in his hand as John was calling him. They hadn't properly talked until John had told him, told him the truth.

"Hello?" He asked the phone, gripping the throw pillow that was on the couch next to him tightly.

"Hey."

John's voice was a nice thing to hear, even after the second half of the semester and the rocky strain that the two of them where going through. "You wanted to talk?"

A small pause before John answered. "Yeah, please, I need to explain everything to you. Please at least give me that."

Alexander stared down at the floor as his free hand began picking at the pillow that was next to him. "I'm listening."

"I told you I was engaged, and my fiancée is pregnant but you left before I could tell you more than that."

Alexander rose an eyebrow. "Is there more to it than that? It seems pretty concrete to me."

John let out a sigh on the other end. "Fine, no I get it, but please here me out. First off, I'm gay. Second off, this is such a mess and we have been dating since high school no thanks to our families being close."

Alexander sat there, listening to John and letting him explain everything before speaking once again. "You know, it was still a pretty shitty thing to do."

John was silent for a long moment before sighing. "I know and I'm sorry."

Alexander let out a soft sigh. "Well, thank you for telling me everything."

"Of course."

There was a moment of silence before Alexander spoke again. "I…can I call you another time?"

"Sure, yeah, that sounds good."

"Bye."

"Bye."

_Laurens Kitchen_

____

____

_4:05_

Marta watched as John hung up the phone, hopeful smile on her face. "That sounded like it went well."

John shrugged his shoulders as he stared at his phone for a long moment before looking over at his sister. "I suppose so."

Before anything else could be said, Henry came into the kitchen, coming over to where Marta and John were sitting. "Good to see you both up, you got home late last night."

"It's a long drive," John shrugged as he shoved his phone back into his pocket as he looked up at his father after a moment or two. "You're home early."

Henry shrugged his shoulders. "Well, I was meeting with the Manning's. If you had been up you could have come with me."

John arched an eyebrow as his gaze followed his farther as the man made his way over to the fridge and began getting things out to start dinner. "Why? Why were you meeting."

Henry pulled out a carton of milk before glancing back over at John. "They want to move up the wedding."

Marta and John both glanced at each other after a moment or two and John pushed himself up out of the chair, moving over to where the island in the kitchen was. "I thought it was in August."

"No, it's going to be at the end of June."

"You couldn't have asked me first before you moved it up?" Before his father could say anything, John turned and stormed out of the kitchen before heading back up stairs to his room, slamming the door shut behind him.

He threw himself on the bed before hearing another knock on the door. "Go away, Marta."

The door opened and John pushed himself up, seeing his father standing there, eyebrow raised. "You want to explain what that was about?"

John winced a bit. He knew he shouldn't have stormed out and gotten angry like he did. He should have explained to his father what was making him feel uneasy about everything. "Sorry, I'm just tired."

It was a reasonable explanation or so he thought.

Henry nodded from where he stood. "Well, you know they want to move it up so it's before she's due, right?"

John wanted to roll his eyes but just let out a small sigh. "Alright, alright."

"They're coming over next week for a dinner so we can get some last-minute details for the wedding done."

John was silent for a long moment. "I have a question."

"Yes?"

"I know it's mainly family, but I have four guests I want to invite to the wedding."

Henry seemed a bit surprised but nodded. "Oh, well, go ahead then. It's on June 30th, so they know and could get here in a timely fashion." A small pause before Henry turned towards the door. "Dinner will be ready in about twenty minutes."

John nodded his head as he pulled out his phone, pulling up some numbers to send some texts. "I'll be down then."

It might have been going off plan of what he and Marta had discussed in the car but he needed to get these messages out and invite those four guests.

**Author's Note:**

> This story started off as a one-shot and now has 15 chapters that are planned. It might be 20, thinking about all I want to do with it and when I go back and finish writing them. The first chapter is going to be posted now while the second chapter won't be coming until February because I have something else I want to finish before that. IF I am able to a new chapter might be posted but I'm making no promises.
> 
> Happy New Year, everyone! I love you all!


End file.
